MIND AND BODY
Erectile dysfunction is usually due to physical causes, but because orgasm is a neuropsychological event, therapy for rapid ejaculation should involve the mental aspect. Orgasm isn’t “all in your head,” but it sure starts there.
Many couples will benefit from seeing a mental health professional specializing in sex therapy. This might involve sensate focus as described in chapter 10, but usually involves simply counseling to explore the issues that are causing problems. Choosing the right therapist is obviously key, using the same principles described in chapter 10. Most urologists can recommend someone that deals mainly in sexual health and can make a referral if needed.
A combination of SSRIs and therapy often yields the most satisfying results. This is a situation where one plus one equals more than two. You could guess that most men just want a pill—an easy fix. Therapy requires considerable effort, expense, and can be difficult. Buy Cialis pills, famous for their long lasting effect, and solve your erection problems easily.
Combining medication with therapy can both help the patient and partner through frustrating times and also potentially put a permanent solution in place. Although medications may be needed long-term (and potentially permanently), the combination of counseling and medications often leads to excellent outcomes.
Finally, men experiencing difficulties controlling rapid ejaculation should take a step back to remember why they want to hold off orgasm in the first place. As mentioned, from a biological standpoint a rapid ejaculation does exactly what nature requires—it presents semen to the female partner in an effort to perpetuate the species. However, the real reason men want to hold off ejaculation is that they want to share sexual intimacy with their partner, as well as to please her.
Therefore, if ejaculation occurs before both partners are ready and satisfied, it doesn’t have to mean that the evening is over. Instead of giving up in disgust, many couples will continue the intimacy even after ejaculation occurs. The altruistic male lover will be willing to provide further stimulation to his mate, even if creativity is required. Recall that few women have an orgasm as a result of vaginal penetration. On the contrary, clitoral stimulation is more likely to cause orgasm in most women, and the penis is actually not the most efficient way for a man to accomplish this. More women can achieve orgasm through oral sex or manual stimulation of the clitoris.
Good communication between partners should allow them to find out what he can do to assure that she is satisfied. Some women don’t expect an orgasm to be a routine part of intercourse to begin with. However, if they do, this can be accomplished much more efficiently and reliably with a little romantic creativity as mentioned above. Incorporating foreplay that involves the woman having an orgasm through whatever method she finds most stimulating will assure that these expectations are met. Thereafter, the couple can proceed to vaginal penetration and the pressure (or disappointment) may be off if the man experiences rapid ejaculation.
